EP118: The Discomfort of Self-Awareness
DISCOMFORT IS WHERE THE MAGIC HAPPENS!
Don’t avoid the discomfort. Just understand it so you can navigate through it.
Enjoy!
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(The notes below are only a brief bullet point summary of what is discussed in the podcast. Be sure to listen to get all of the goodness! If you would like a full transcription of the episode, please send an email request to: angie@angie-robinson.com. We’d be happy to provide that!)
Here, we're going to talk about the discomfort that can come along with self-awareness. I think, in general, people really understand the concept of self-awareness. Self-awareness truly is the pixie dust to elevating and getting the results that you really want.
There might be a little less understanding of what actually lies underneath that big umbrella of self-awareness. There are a lot of things, including things like being aware of our personality preferences, our strengths areas of improvement, our blind spots, how our brain works and how our thoughts truly do create our results. It's really understanding our why, It's really discovering, embracing and aligning all of our actions and behaviors with our values. These are just some of the things that fall underneath that umbrella of self-awareness.
What’s talked about even less is how uncomfortable self-awareness actually can be. When we get uncomfortable - we know we are on the right track. But that doesn’t make it easy!
Here are some of the watchouts and potential' “risks” of self-awareness that lead to discomfort:
Can lead to feelings of isolation. Sometimes when people are excessively self-aware, they tend to isolate themselves from others. They spent a lot of time alone thinking about themselves.
Can amplify self-sabotage and beating yourself up. This is not helpful. When you start to look at things differently, you realize that there are some things you want to work on. This can open up the gates to beat yourself up. This is your human brain trying to protect you from discomfort, from failing or from embarrassment. This will not move you forward. It is helpful to practice self-compassion and learn how to reprogram your brain.
Can overextend your strengths. You might actually overdo the things that we might innately be good - almost in a way of wanting to prove something so others can’t see your ‘flaws”.
Can prompt buffering behaviors. When we buffer - we are trying to avoid uncomfortable feelings instead of processing them. Examples of buffering behaviors include: overeating, spending excessive time on social media, over exercising, overworking, lashing out on people or withdrawing. Anything that creates a distraction so we don't have to deal with the uncomfortable feelings.
The discomfort that we feel is like the messy middle or the river of misery. In order to get to the other side of that river, we are going to have go in and battle the current, the slippery rocks, the rapids. It’s not easy. It's within that river of misery that some of the truth comes out. It’s where we have to be honest with ourselves.
This takes commitment. It takes time. It takes a lot of willingness to make lasting change happen. And it's super easy to slip back into our old thinking or old behaviors, our old ways. That's why we are always a work in progress.
This awareness, this knowledge, is so powerful. It can lead you to make better decisions for yourself. build closer relationships, make deeper commitments to your job, your peers and to your team and ultimately show up authentically who you want to be. But we have to be willing to dive in and navigate through that river of misery. It’s taking a step back before taking a couple steps forward.
I promise - the other side of the messy middle, of the river of misery, is worth it.
What Do You Think?
Are you open to the possibilities that are on the other side of discomfort?
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